Episcopal Relief & Development’s 2025 LENTEN Meditation Journey . . . A COMMONPLACE Lent

Offer advice with the deference of humility, and do not presume to defend your point of view obstinately. —Rule of Saint Benedict

Several years ago, our family spent a year attempting to live out as many practices from the Rule of Saint Benedict as possible. We did this partly because I was writing a book on the experiment and because my husband, Nathan, and I felt our family was at a crossroads and needed a reset. We needed to take the time to identify our family’s vocation and values and then align our actions. So, we set about incorporating practices such as stillness, silence, service, prayer, fasting and humility into our common life. Some worked, some flopped and some we carry on to this day.

One of the practices we continue is Mutual Listening in the kitchen. Nathan and I clashed in the kitchen for the first half of our marriage. He likes to follow a recipe to the smallest detail, while I prefer to read recipes as suggestions. Nathan goes to the grocery store with a list of ingredients; I open the pantry and make do with what I can find. He dices an onion with precision; I just chop it up. By practicing Mutual Listening in the kitchen, we each need to be willing to listen and learn. We do this by taking turns being “chef” and “sous chef.” The primary rule of this Mutual Listening practice was that the sous chef could not critique the chef’s directions, recipe or technique and that the chef would not be defensive if the sous chef asked questions for clarification. Instead, each person committed to assume goodwill from the other, chopping, stirring, leading and following from a place of love instead of defensiveness. It took about six months of intentional practice to build the muscles of humility and trust needed to cook side by side as equals, but transformation happened. Funny how that works.

For REFLECTION:

What relationships in your life—at home, church and work—could benefit from an intentional practice of Mutual Listening?

Click here to read the introduction to the 2025 Lenten Meditation “A Commonplace Lent.”

The Lenten Meditations prepared by Episcopal Relief & Development invite readers to deepen their spiritual practice during the season of Lent, the time of preparation leading to Easter. Our 2025 meditations explore the idea of “A Commonplace Lent.” This concept reflects Episcopal Relief & Development’s tagline: “Working Together for Lasting Change.” We share in common the work of advancing lasting change in communities impacted by injustice, poverty, disaster and climate change.

We also share in common spiritual practices that strengthen our faith—prayer, worship, love, grace, service and so much more. The author explores another meaning of common in the  meditations: finding God in the common and ordinary as well as in the extraordinary mountain-top moments. Each day begins with wisdom from desert mothers and fathers, monastics and other spiritual leaders who offer insight into our common path of faithful discipleship and service. Each meditation concludes with a question for deeper reflection.

Episcopal Relief & Development is the compassionate response of The Episcopal Church to human suffering in the world. Hearing God’s call to seek and serve Christ in all persons and to respect the dignity of every human being, Episcopal Relief & Development serves to bring together the generosity of Episcopalians and others with the needs of the world.

This Lenten Meditation Journey is provided courtesy of Episcopal Relief & Development and was authored by Jerusalem Jackson Greer, co-executive director and agrarian minister for the Procter Center, an Episcopal farm, camp and retreat center in the Episcopal Diocese of Southern Ohio. As former manager of evangelism and discipleship for The Episcopal Church under Presiding Bishop Michael Curry, she co-founded the Good News Garden movement and oversaw Way of Love and Evangelism initiatives for the wider church.